I have an axe to grind. Unfortunately, that axe is more about me than about others.
Last night I posted something I had been thinking about. It had to do with judging our own motives as well as the motives of others. I decided to blog about it so I can keep it for myself as a reminder, as my blog really is an online journal. Here is what I wrote, with a few additional thoughts that I have had since then. For whatever reason, this verse was in my mind tonight:
"When Eliab, David's oldest brother, heard David speaking with the men, he burned with anger at him and asked, "Why have you come down here? And with whom did you leave those few sheep in the wilderness? I know how conceited you are and how wicked your heart is; you came down only to watch the battle."
What is interesting is that one chapter before, God says this: "People see only the outward appearance. The LORD alone knows the heart." David's brother saw his younger brother David with what I call a "jaded eye", suspecting pretty much anything David did as being from a conceited, self-serving heart.
But it wasn't true. God ALONE knew the truth about what was in David's heart.
The Apostle Paul faced this as well from the Corinthian Church, a church he himself had birthed. They had begun to suspect his motives, calling into question his character. Paul wrote to them this:
"I care very little if I am judged by you....; indeed, I do not even judge myself. My conscience is clear, but that does not make me innocent. It is the Lord alone who judges me. Therefore judge nothing before the appointed time; wait until the Lord comes. He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time each will receive their praise from God."
The fact is we always see our motives as being pure but suspect the motives of others.
It saddens me personally how many times over the years I made myself a judge, THINKING I knew whether or not someone was sincere in their repentance, sincere in their heart toward God.
"Lord, please help me to take this deeply to heart and leave judgement to You alone concerning my heart as well as the heart of others."
PB
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